Whenever I think about emotions these days, I can’t help but picture Disney Pixar’s Inside Out. If you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend it. The film follows a young girl named Riley, whose emotions each have their own role—whether it’s protecting her from danger, guiding her toward joy, or fighting for justice. And the truth is, we’re no different. All of us carry emotions inside us that serve a purpose.
Before I go further, let me clarify something: I may use the words emotions and feelings interchangeably, but technically there’s a distinction. Emotions are the automatic, physiological responses our brains and bodies generate (like fear making your heart race), while feelings are the conscious experience of those emotions (like naming that sensation “anxiety” or “worry”). For the purposes of this conversation, when I say emotions, I mean both—the full inner experience of what it is to feel human.
The challenge is that these inner experiences don’t always make life easier. Sometimes they push us to say or do things we later regret. They can complicate decisions, cloud our thinking, and even make doing the “right” thing feel confusing. No wonder so many of us end up feeling like emotions are a nuisance or even the enemy.
But imagine for a moment what life would be like without them. Every action would be monotone, purely logical, driven by robotic calculations about outcomes—no matter who might be hurt in the process. Personally, I wouldn’t want to live that way. It would be like watching a movie in black and white. Emotions, by contrast, are what bring life into full color. They add zest, beauty, and depth. They remind us we’re alive.
It’s not that feelings are good or bad. Sure, we all prefer emotions like joy or peace over anger or sadness. But every emotion has a function. None of them show up randomly. The sooner we embrace them rather than reject them, the sooner we can understand what they’re trying to tell us and fold that wisdom into our decision-making.
I often compare emotions to the dashboard of a car. One of the most dreaded signals is the check engine light. Most of us groan when we see it, worried about the hassle or cost. Now, imagine if we just slapped a smiley-face sticker over that light so we didn’t have to look at it anymore. Problem solved, right? Of course not. Ignoring the warning doesn’t mean the issue under the hood has gone away. In fact, the longer we ignore it, the worse it gets—until one day the engine blows on the middle of the freeway.
Emotions work the same way. They aren’t our enemies. They’re signals pointing us toward what we truly value and care about. The more we invite them into the conversation, the better we can align with what matters most—and ultimately, choose better.
